I am a work in progress/ dressed in the fabric of a world unfolding . . .

Last year was really rough on people that I knew personally on some level or another. The majority of my charitable efforts went to donating to paying it forward. So far this year, gods willing, people I know seem steadier on their feet.

I would like to get back to raising money for RAINN. I had a great start with ...my annual fund raising dinner with the Amethyst Circle of Sisters and I plan on having more events as well as crafts and writing efforts going directly to RAINN. If you would like to contribute towards my goal, or just keep up with what I'm doing, please check out my RAINNmaker webpage.

Potential RAINN Fundraiser

[Poll #1521687]

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• I'm a RAINN Maker! rainnmakers.rainn.org/deborahmcastellano #
• So I read Cleaving, which is Julie Powell's follow up memoir (Julie/Julia Project) and all the really naughty bits can be found online #
• through various reviewers who were all *gasp!* How dare you be naughty and do naughty things and then not be SORRY about it! #
• How dare you not offer us a neatly tied up ending where you either get a divorce or went through marriage counseling and saw the light #
• and now are super sorry and super devoted? How dare you be a butcher since it's trendy to be a butcher now! #
• I'm like, jesus people. Give the poor woman a break. I do agree with Jezabel, that it doesn't sound like the most ideal open marriage #
• But honestly, like it or not, that's often where poly/swinging starts - by making mistakes. A lot of them. I don't like that she's supposed #
• to be penatent or that she's supposed to resemble a real life Nora Ephron character instead of a real life person. #
• I like the pictures of her, she's a little zaftig and she looks at the camera challengingly. I want to perfect that look, personally. #
• I actually enjoyed reading her book and her fumbling to figure out what she wants because again, guess what, that's life. I liked that she #
• goes after what she wants. I like how honest she is about her problems. I don't know. She seems like someone I'd be friends with. #
• I just respect her honesty. I wouldn't want my life personally to get quite so . . .messy, but I respect that she was willing to. #
• Being snowed in for the weekend is looking increasingly more likely. I think I need the break. I've been hitting the ground running since #
• Arisia and it's been one small kitchen fire after another to put out and it's exhausting. #
• I saw James' new place yesterday, it's v. nice. #
• I'm looking forward to being warm and cozy in our condo this weekend. Spinning yarn. Sewing dollies. Writing. Cooking. Baking. #
• Watching bad telly. Mixing cocktails. #
• My tummy has been off lately, I think it's stress. #
• I love that in our condo it's always warm and toasty (and affordable to keep it that way). I can even let my hair air dry in the winter. #
• I'm day dreaming about what to make for dinner. I haven't fully decided yet. #
• Maybe chicken paprika. #
• I got the bracelet helper thingie. I can now get my bracelet on in approx 3 minutes, which isn't bad. #
• I <3 my Brumbys so hard. They are honestly just as good as Uggs #
• Just as warm, just as high quality and at $30 on sale, I can buy a new pair yearly. #
• I started writing down all my misc expenses for this month (I bought roving, v-day gifts, etc.) to keep better track of my disposible income #

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Moar Website!

dossy as usual completely rocks out. We had a conversation in the beginning of our collab on the website where he was like, are you sure you don't want a blog? You're prolly gonna want one. And me being like, psssht. Blogs are for chumps.

Sure enough, I want a blog. dossy, being a gentleman, didn't comment on my predictable fickleness past saying that's why my site is built in WordPress.

So my "work" blog is about my works in progress. I syndicated it here (again, because dossy is awesome) debmcastellano . I don't expect to be prolific there really, but it's going to be a blog focused as the title indicates, on my works in progress.

Do you remember the JAMC/ and reading aloud from magazines?

Last night:

Me: Put on table, please.
Jow: No.
Me: Put. On. Table.
Jow: No.
Me: How dare you! I'm the Empress of Cocktail-Land! Put! On! Table!
Jow: You're merely a figurehead.
Me (hisses): You take that back.

. . . this is all in reference to a small plate, so you can appreciate the grandiosity of the situation.


God, I don't know what it is, but I have zero willpower for work. Like, work at work, the idea of doing any actual work at home (unfun chores, making dollies, or writing). I want to make dinner and like nine million Madelines to shove down my maw washed down with wine and ice cream ending with a Mr. Gouda (three year aged Gouda) orgasm and watch like 12 hours of Lifetime movies about Teens Gone Wrong will spinning like 50 yards of yarn.

What? Surely I can't be the only one with these unholy desires.

When I am feeling exhausted or having a shitty day, these are my preferred tv viewing:

* Little Miss Perfect (child beauty pagent)
* Intervention
* Celeb Rehab
* Teen Mom
* 16 and Pregnant
* Hoarders

When one is staring down the spiral of all of that mess, it's *impossible* not to feel awesome about yourself.

I think I'm exhausted, like Hollywood exhausted. Ever since coming back from Arisia I've been working OT, putting out a million tiny (and not so tiny) fires (AHHHHHHHH! Your car doesn't have oil any more! AHHHHHHHHHHH! Computer emergency with Mothra/Melissa. AHHHHHHHHHH! [delete]'s husband has cancer! AHHHHHHHHHH! [deleted]'s mom died (also of cancer!) AHHHHHHHHHH! [deleted] is fighting with [alsodeleted] and [alsodeleted] doesn't know it . . .yet! AHHHHHHHHHH! Run a million errands! AHHHHHHHHHH! Figure out your travel plans! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! You're a bridesmaid! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Your story needs massive work!).

I'm done. I'm burned out. Tonight I will be indulging in all my dark desires and probably Sat too and then Sun I will attempt to get a "normal" (HAHAHAHAHA) schedule going with housework, cooking, crafting, writing, and exercise.

We'll see.